"Although seated among children and grandchildren, she did not cease to wear clothes of mourning, treating all her family insultingly by thinking of herself as childless when they were still living", Seneca, Consolation to Marcia, 3 The goal of negative visualization is clearly not to make us think of other people as indifferent. It's a self-inflicted wake-up call to help us revise our priorities and make us more aware of the good things we have in our life right now. In other words, it's not about thinking "I could lose my daughter, but it doesn't matter because she's not all that important". It's about thinking: "I could lose my daughter, even though she's one of the most important things in my life. I had better get the best out of every single moment I have with her and stop wasting time on things that are not important" Obviously, you can't love someone if you think of them as a preferred indifferent. First of all it'